Biscuit

A bloke in a bar spots a very sexy woman wearing the tightest pair of trousers he has ever seen. They almost look as though they have been painted on. Eventually, curiosity gets the better of him. So he goes overto the woman and says "sorry to bother you , but how on earth do you get into those trousers?" The woman replies "Well, you could start by buying me a drink"!!!

You give me some beer and you can have mine! :)

Two blondes in bed, one says "I dont think much of this wife swapping business." The other replies "Me niether, i wonder how the men are doing".

Harry proposes to Mary and she agrees on one condition. He must give her a solid gold pocketknife. Harry looks over but after drawing several blanks he has one made. He presents it to Mary and asks what shes going to do with it. "I'll keep it in a drawer untill i get old." she says "And what will you do with it then?"asks Harry. "Well," explains Mary,"by the time i'm 70 my hair will be grey, my skin wrinkled, my teeth fallen out and my boobs wil down round my knees. You're not going to want to have sex with me are you?" "I still dont understand," says a confused Harry. "Well," replies Mary. "I figure that a boy scout would do hell of a lot for a solid gold pocketknife."

Sheila is having a serious chat with her boyfreind Gary. "We need to decide where we're going," she says. "I think we're at a crossroads.one path leads the way of commitment,happiness and joy.The other well, it just leads to a dead end." She pauses as Gary looks on with a blank expression. "Do you have any thing to say about that?"Sheila asks. Gary replies "Thats not a crossroads,its a T-junction."

Ive got motorquip onthe front and mintex on the rear

Was you behind me when you heard that conversation? :wacko:

Hi Gregers It could be your brake pad wear indicators. it will go off because the pressure has been released off the pads check this first if you havent already Biscuit

clicked and been counted,

Hi all mine used to go into 'limp home mode' (loss of turbo power) i just 'boot it' every now and then, which i do and never get any probs now at first you will get a lot of black smoke out the back but thats just the turbo clearing out hope this helps. Biscuit

These men are installing bollards to stop cars parking on the pavement outside an Irish sports bar. They are cleaning up at the end of the day. How long do you think it will be before they realize?

Ever see an iceberg from top to bottom? Well, here's your chance !! This is awesome! This came from a Rig Manager for Global Marine Drilling in St. Johns, Newfoundland They actually have to divert the path of these things away from the rig by towing them with ships! Anyway, in this particular case the water was calm and the sun was almost directly overhead so that the diver was able to get into the water and click this picture. They estimated the weight at 300,000,000 tons. Beautiful clear water . . ..

garibaldi, hows that arm after i drove off with you hanging onto the tow bar and where did you stash the dosh???? Arm still flamin' hurts!!! invested the cash in a VEYRON!!!!! :lol: :lol:

"The Last Photo I Ever Took" Contest... AND THE WINNERS ARE:

Man says to wife 'I had a wet dream about you last night. I dreamt you got > run over by a bus and I p****d myself laughing'.

Larry la Prise who wrote the hokey cokey has died aged 93. The worst part > was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in, then the > trouble started.

SHORT & SWEET. A couple in a cafe in Llangollen asks 'Can you settle an > argument for us and pronounce where we are, VERY slowly?' The waitress > leaned over and said 'BURRR - GURRR - KING'. >

I dont think FM has a separate aerial its just that its a stronger signal than AM I think :lol:

I've still got the original Dunlop 2020's on the back done 58k and ive got Dunlop Sport Sp01 on the front they are a lot quieter than the 2020's and have more grip!

Very good :lol:

Rule 11 When booster heater is bellowing white smoke out and your sat at traffic lights only to be told your car is on fire! reply "Not again" then see their faces drop as they speed off!!!!