teresa

dont know if any of these have been posted before but here goes The centre for disease control has issued an urgent medical alert about a highly contagious and potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally by hand - and even electronically. The virus Weary Overloaded Recreational Killer - or WORK If you receive WORK from your boss via any means, do not touch it. This virus wipes out your private life completely. if you should come into contact with WORK. you should immediately take two good friends to the nearest store and purchase either of these antidotes; Work Isolating Neutraliser Extract (WINE) or Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Continue to keep taking antidote until you are sure WORK has been completely flushed from your system ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Q What did the nun say to her brand new vibrator A 'oh stop shaking with fear, my dear!. Its the first time for me too'.

oh yes maz loves a slap .......... but dont tell her i told ya :unsure: oops there goes a promise :lol:

welcome lastmanstanding from me oh my this post has had me instiches 1st laugh ive had for a while so thanks for cheering me up mary hope ya toe is on the mend my fella broke his little toe a few months ago he broke it racing my daughter to the bath.... He nearly ended up in casualty again the other day a bloody big kestral went for him because he was protecting my finch (hawkbait is his name)..i put him ouside in his cage and a kestral landed on it so my fella went ouside shooed off the kestral, grabbed the cage came back in the house turned round to shut the patio doors and there is this Kestral with its talons out coming straight for him

welcome back little matt :angry2:

no cus i fart and burp just like a man at least im truthful

ohhh its so nice to be classed as a lady welcome Dpm i wont be a lady tonight COME ON YOU REDS THRASH THE CANARIES

ok john what do you want slapping with...... belt,? whip? bare hands? the choice is yours

hey im not desperate just like a challange

ooooh was gonna say im free then realsied you were not offering anything how disappointing :)

omg im in shock.... my baby has passed her mot with no advisorys but cost me

Woman's love poem Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep. One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who loves to listen long. One who thinks before he speaks, One who'll call, not wait for weeks. I pray he's gainfully employed. When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door. Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind. Knows what to say to, 'How big is my behind?' I pray this man will love me no end And always be my very best friend. __________ Man's love poem I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a bar on a golf course, and loves to send me fishing and hunting. This doesn't rhyme and I don't care.

3 WOMEN IN A SAUNA THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. "THAT WAS MY PAGER," SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM. A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE SECOND YOUNG WOMAN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, "THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND." THE OLDER WOMAN FELT VERY LOW -TECH. NOT TO BE OUT DONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER REAR END. THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER. THE OLDER WOMAN FINALLY SAID.........WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT... I'M GETTING A FAX!!

ok who felt it all i heard was jase saying what the f--- then next thing the whole house started shaking never felt my heart pound so much...

woohoo bleeno me thinks youve pulled go get ya coat ..... welcome to the mad house mary :(

aint i glad i dont bloody smoke... but there again i dont need to smoke to get short tempered and angry around here bloody traffic is awful enough to put anyone in a bad mood

i aint got a gal but there is a red gal at end of our culdisac (is that how ya spell ) if ya see the red gal look in the far right corner you will see 2 mx5s a red and a yellow

ohhh i like ya new home maz.....and yes guys im back..... in library at mo but hopefully back on line tomorrow got here at 9.30 pm saturday took us just under 6 hrs but everything is fine house is nice... we were disappointed when we got here as they said they were leaving all the downstairs flooring as we were leaving ours but they didnt so more expense ....NWB still not seen ya driving past ... i must still be in bed speak to ya all soon take care teresa

welcome back ....

im still here .... geez i hate waiting went over to sign over my tenancy today what fun that was the other couple that are moving in here should of been here for 12.45 so we could be at the housing office for 1.30 we started to panick when they didnt turn up till 1.45 thought they had pulled out but nope its on oh yea norwichbluenose ill send my daughter round to pinch ya pc shes fed up ours aint going on till 22nd and there is nothing worse than a hormonal teenager who cant get what she wants

pmsl... oh well mines going off at 8pm tonight and im not back on till 22nd so maz if ya read this ITS GOOD TO HAVE YA BACK MAZ SEE YA ALL ON 22ND

cheeky git dont expect to be invited in for a brew now

aye i cant be missed lol .... you will notice me looking lost if anything especially around the wroxham rd area :)

awww what bad luck :) :D ok whos getting the beers in?

glad things went ok and shes in her new home safely .....same cant be said for me and fella we are already arguing aint moved yet ......... im packing boxes and hes getting things out .... god help us saturday be like world war 3 here and in norwich when we get there about 10.30 pm

ok whos got the party poppers ..... thought we were havin a party?