gaznlou

Help please, mate has mkIi, his dead locks have kicked in (faulty locks) on front doors, how does he get dead locks off please?

Get your money on a horse called V Nek, odds are 40/1 its meant to be a good jumper :)

Cheers Gregers, If I am still welcome, I will drop in from time to time. Ok A nice one for all you gamblers, Early Tip For Grand National, CREOSOTE, 15/1 I have been told it's good over the fences. :(

Ladies and Gentlemen I no longer have the need for a Seven seater, therefore it's on Ebay for sale, Thanks to all who have helped, joked and just passed on their comments in the past, it's a great forum, with some great people. Thanks again Gaz

BRILLIANT!! Trouble is the tax ran out over a year ago :ph34r:

That would be 96XF 9F715 BA, Same as the Old Scorpio 95-98 model

Is that not what, I said :D

Sounds like a wiring fault either in the door pillars or check under the passenger seat for your very own swimmingpool. where the module is located

Dave I take it, after I posted, the reply the 12V socket, Fuses are under the front drivers seat, yours is ok now ;)

Ford Puma 1.7 for sale, 2000my, taxed Feb 2010 and 12 months MOT Jan 2011, New clutch and Slave Cyl fitted last month, cam belt has been changed, currently 96000 miles on clock, Never smoked in, serviced regularly, Black in Colour, Lux pack, good example, Wifes car, very much loved, Right now the bad bits slight rust bubbles on RH rear arch (you will see this on most Pumas) bumper lip (rubber seal on front bumper needs changing (minor job) looking for

Sorry Gregers could'nt resist :-)

My Wife asked me where I was taking her for Valentines day, my black eye and thick lip, suggests up the Arse is not the correct answer.

A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale ' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there. 'You talk?' he asks. 'Yep,' the Lab replies. After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?' The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.' 'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running. But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.' 'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.' The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. 'Ten dollars,' the guy says. 'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?' 'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit.

Dave Fuses for rear sockets are under the drivers seat. Gaz

Yep loads of the stuff

For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he said he would pay her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born.. To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write 'Spaghetti' on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin. One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife. 'Honey, she said, 'you received a very strange post card today.' 'Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later,' he said. The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted. On the card was written: Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Three with meatballs, two without. Send extra sauce.

A man enters the confessional and says "Bless me father for I have sinned; it has been one month since my last confession. I've had sex with Fannie Green every week for the last month." The priest tells the sinner, "You are forgiven. Go out and say three Hail Mary's." Soon, another man enters the confessional. "Father, it has been two months since my last confession. I have had sex with Fannie Green twice a week for the last two months." This time the priest asks, "Who is this Fannie Green?" "A new woman in the neighbourhood," the sinner replies. "Very well," says the priest. "Go and say ten Hail Mary's." The next morning in church, the priest is preparing to deliver his sermon when a gorgeous, tall woman enters the church. All the men's eyes fall upon her as she slowly sashays up the aisle and sits, down in front of the altar. Her dress is green and very short, with matching shiny emerald green shoes. The priest and altar boy gasp as the woman sits down with her legs slightly spread apart, Sharon Stone style. The priest turns to the altar boy and whispering asks, "Is that Fannie Green?" The altar boy replies, "No Father, I think it's just the reflection off her shoes".

Ford Puma 1.7 for sale, 2000my, taxed Feb 2010 and MOT Jan 2010, New clutch and Slave Cyl fitted last month, cam belt has been changed, currently 96000 miles on clock, Never smoked in, serviced regularly, Black in Colour, Lux pack, good example, Wifes car, very much loved, Right now the bad bits slight rust bubbles on RH rear arch (you will see this on most Pumas) bumper lip (rubber seal on front bumper needs changing (minor job) looking for

Dave In My experience I have found Kwik fit like to add little extras, when the vehicle is on the ramps, things like sorry Sir/Madam your disc are far too worn and need replacing, if you don't have them replaced at the same time of fitting the pads then sorry we cannot give you a guarantee.

Your welcome Just watch that spring they have been known to fly off.

Do you have this type fitted ;) ? Audio_System.doc

Gregers This was a hoax around 3 years ago, I am not saying it's not possible, but it was certainly a hoax 3 years ago. Check out hoax slayer.....

psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young Mothers and their small children. You all have obsessions,' he observed. To the first mother, Mary, he said, 'You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy.' He turned to the second Mom, Ann: 'Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.' He turned to the third Mom, Kathy: 'Your obsession is alcohol. This too shows itself in your child's name, Brandy.' At this point, the fourth mother, Joyce, quietly got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered, 'Come on Dick, this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Let

Has anyone on here actually recieved anything yet ?

Every member will get one. Is this why they call it Spam so everyone replies :D