Eric Morecambe

http://www.fordgalaxy.org.uk/ford/index.php?s=&showtopic=11428&view=findpost&p=95499 Changed Freewheel Alternator Pulley and another belt. Problem sorted. Many thanks to everyone who posted their recommendations.

Morticiaskeeper Brake calipers - all except rear n/s nikpv rear door window switch mkII Ral Parking Sensors playboy central locking control unit PaulH Mk2 cup holder (left one if it makes any difference.) wingnut9811 galaxy mk1 drivers window switch wanted swifty galaxy mk2 O/S rear passenger electric window motor Ondra plastic rocker valve cover (tdi pd 115bhp eng. code AUY ERIC MORECAMBE Mk1 Ford Granada Headlamps

Try and pull out the internal lugs more from the socket. I done it on mine and it worked until they got worn down again ... I fitted another power socket to the n/s of the centre console in the end ...

Ernie myself and Tommy were doing a psychiatry lesson. Ernie was asked whats the opposite of Joy, Ernie said 'Sorrow'. I was asked whats the opposite of Depression, and I said 'Happiness'. Tommy was asked whats the opposite of Woe, he replied 'GIDDY UP'.

Went to a funeral yesterday with my new girlfriend. It was the first time I met her family. Tell you what, they're a bunch of miserable so and so's!

My mate Tommy Cooper took his Goldfish back to Pet Shop complaining that it suffers from Epilepsy. The shop owner says "It looks calm enough to me Mr Cooper" Tommy replies "You av'nt taken it out the bowl yet"

Got a Chinese last night & on the way home in the car I heard the bag rustling. I looked over, seen a pair of eyes looking out the top of the bag then they disappeared. Could'nt believe it. I carried on driving home when it happened again. I was so shocked I nearly crashed the car. I looked over and there were the eyes looking at me, then disappeared. I went back to the Chinese to and said " What the hell is going on with my takeaway I ordered" Chinese man replied " Eric you no worry, its only Peking Duck "

I got sacked from our local paper being an Agony Aunt ... Dear Eric, I left home for work last week and after less than a mile my car stalled and wouldn't start. I walked back to our home to find my husband in bed with our 19 year old babysitter They announced that the affair had been going on for two years. Can you help me I'm desperate! Dear reader: The most common cause of vehicles breaking down in the first mile is dirt in the fuel lines. Hope this helps, Eric.

Hello to all. Registered yesterday [16th Feb]

I had this problem on my 53' plate so I changed the aux belt and tensioner. It was better but on full lock whilst parking it still made noises and vibrates. Think my Galaxy's problem is the steering pump, so I just carefully rev it a bit more to lose the sound and vibration.

Ernie met this lass and took her home to meet me and the wife I whispered to Ernie "Where the hell did you meet her?" "She's cross eyed, bow legged, no hair & got few teeth!"" Ernie replied "There's no need to whisper Eric, she's deaf"